Oh, sweet baby- you’ve been in my “belly” for SIX FULL MONTHS now and you don’t even have a clue how happy that makes me. I have waited and prayed for you daily.
Your Daddy and I made two sweet babies before you that were only here for a few short months. God had different plans for them- they were ready to go to Heaven so much sooner than you or I. He chose YOU to stick it out and become our first Earthly baby. You must have a big purpose in life and I can’t wait to find out what it is, who you are, and what you will become.
During these last few years of waiting to even get to this moment with you, I have tried to learn some of the reasons I am even being chosen to be your Mommy. I have learned that patience and deep love and understanding for not just myself, but for others is key to a happier life. I was sad, hurt, confused, and even a little angry in October of 2015. By June of 2016 I had mostly moved on from several of those feelings, as there was nothing I could do to change the past. Little did I know, God still had more for me to learn before you could be a part of my life. I took a job offer for a preschool position teaching three year olds. You don’t know this yet, (or maybe you do from all the belly hugs I get, and sweet little ones telling you hello, good night, and their names daily) but I adore kids and watching them learn and grow. By August, I realized I would be learning even MORE about patience, but in a very different way before I could be ready for you. I’ve watched, helped, and taught nine wonderful kids grow and learn this year. The crazy thing is, as much as I have taught them, they have taught me even more about what it will take to be an incredible role model.
Little did I know, God decided in November that I was ready for you. Finding out in December was one of the happiest moments of my life. (By the way, I used the dogs to share the news with your Dad.)
I have been scared more days than not. Confused some days. Beyond happy. In love. But, I’ve also had six months to get to know you in a way no one else ever will! I’ve had six months to learn even more about your Daddy and fall in love with him even more than I already was, for completely new reasons.
So many times I hear people say:
“Pregnancy is hard.” (It is- and everyone experiences it differently, but so is being an adult somedays.)
“Pregnancy is tiring.” (The tiredness and lack of sleep do get to me some days, but some days work alone can be tiring.)
“Pregnancy is too long.” (It is long, but so are many other things in life…)
So many people complain about the weight gain, stretch marks, and spider veins. Or, hey- the throwing up. (Which I have done my share of.)
So many people say: “I can’t wait for my baby to get here.”
However, I refuse to let those moments and thoughts creep in. I refuse to wish away these last three months where I get to hog you all to myself. Don’t get me wrong- I am so excited to meet you- but I am soaking up every second of this short time with you.
I pray God’s plans remain to have you enter this world as our perfect baby, no matter the circumstances.
There is a Bible verse that has stood out to me for some time:
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
So, daughter of mine, take these three months and become your wonderful, smart, beautiful self. I can wait, happily.
Life moves so incredibly fast. I know you won’t be little for long once you do arrive. I can wait, patiently.
Friends, love, likes, dislikes, and growing pains will come (and go) quickly- at every stage of your life. Take your time becoming brave, independent, and smart. I will wait, with an open mind.
I love you so much already.
Love, Mommy (Now that is something I can’t wait for you to call me! So you can hurry- maybe even before you say “Daddy!”)